Thursday, May 31, 2012

A Light at the End of the Tunnel

In 20 days we will be on a plane headed back to the States and although I've enjoyed our travels, it won't be one minute too soon.

I haven't been on the scale since early May and at that point I was 166lb.  I haven't dared to step on since, but I know that things are bad since I have about four pairs of pants that actually fit me now.  On our most recent trip, I caught an image of myself in the full-length mirror in the hotel.  I really didn't like what I saw and was forever grateful that our apartment only has mirrors that show us from the shoulders up or I'd feel even worse about myself every day.

I hate feeling uncomfortable every minute of every day and I know that I only have myself to blame.  There are some factors that are beyond my control here (such as the minimum fat content on meat here being 13%), but I'm sure the brunt of the blame falls to me.

As if I didn't feel bad enough about myself, I know that going home, everyone who hasn't seen me since Christmas when I was at my lowest is going to be commenting on how I look now (whether to my face or behind my back).  To top things off, all my "fat" clothes are in a storage unit that I won't have access to until we have a permanent residence, so I'll have to buy new clothes as soon as we get home.  There's nothing I hate more than buying clothes in a bigger size when I know that I have them already.  I'll even have to buy new bathing suits for the beach, since I doubt that I'll be bikini ready only six weeks from our return.

Although it's super convenient when it comes to feeding Brady, I will not miss the easy access to street food.  In the States, you have to consciously make the effort to eat out, whereas here food is everywhere.  I'm hoping that the instant decrease in fat content and carbs in my diet will help give me a jump start when I get back and the number isn't as bad as I think it's going to be when I step on a scale in a meeting during the first week in July.

When we touch down in the States, I'll be starting at square one, but I know from past upswings that I can take the weight off, it's just a matter of hard work and will power.  I can guarantee I'll be in the gym within 24 hours of our return because I just hate the way that I feel.  In the meantime, I'll be rocking out to "Fat Bottomed Girls" (either original of Glee version) and "Stronger" by Kelly Clarkson.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

6 Year Anniversary!

Six years ago today, I walked through the doors of weight watchers and changed my life forever.  I had just finished my sophomore year of college and was seriously unhappy with how I looked and felt in my clothes (gosh doesn't sound too different from now).  My mom was overweight too, so we went together.  I can still remember how shocked I was to see my starting weight : 197.2lb.  I had only weighed 183 the last time I'd weighed myself only 6 weeks before, so I wasn't expecting a number so close to 200lb.

That first summer, away from college food and classes, helped to spark my weight loss.  My mom and I were so very serious about our new lifestyle and that first summer, that I lost 25.6lb, which was 13% of my starting weight.

There have been a lot of ups and downs since that first day in May 2006.  In that span of six years, I met Andy, graduated college and grad school, got married, had Brady, became a lifetime member, and finally moved to Germany.  We've gone through our fair share of program changes as well.  I've gotten as high as 215lb (the day before Brady was born) and gotten down as low as 148.2lb (right before this last Christmas).  I've had periods of gaining where I've had to take the weight off over again, and other times where I've been stuck in a maintain for six months or more.  Right now, I'm in a difficult position of gaining weight, but I know as soon as I get home and have more control, I'll take it back off again, just like I've always done in the past.  No matter what has happened, up or down, I don't regret walking into that meeting room and changing my life for the better!

Here's how I've weighed-in at the anniversary point each year, since I started.

May 2, 2006 : 197.2 lb
May 2, 2007 : 165.2 lb (down 32lb from previous year)
May 2, 2008 : 172.4 lb (up 7.2lb from previous year)
May 2, 2009 : 164.2 lb (down 8.2lb from previous year)
May 2, 2010 : 187.0 lb (up 22.8lb from previous year)
May 2, 2011 : 168.6lb (down 18.4lb from previous year)
May 2, 2012 : 164.4lb (down 4.2lb from previous year)

Overall, in exactly six years, I've netted a loss of 32.8lb.  Even though I'm in an upswing, I'm nowhere near where I started on day 1 and I'll be happy to never see that starting number ever again!  Thanks weight watchers!